The Backup Plan

So full disclosure: I had NO idea what I was going to write this week. The topics on my mind are going to require more time to write than I had the mental energy to spend this week and I was at a complete loss. Then last night happened…

If you’ve been reading my blog for awhile, you might remember that I wrote a post on anxiety a while back (if you missed it, you can check it out here). The post started after my kiddo had spent the last couple of hours crying from being sick and how hard it was for me to handle. At that point I had been trying to cope with yoga and meditation, which was helping with the small things, but I was at the point that I needed to start exploring some other options. I went to the doctor and got a prescription for a VERY small dosage to only use as needed and I’ve only needed it a couple of times. When situations come up, I try really hard to tackle it on my own before I resort to medicine. There’s a family history of addiction that I’m staying conscious of and I really want to avoid popping a pill every time something hard comes up. I know that I’m really overdoing the caution, but I don’t want to start relying on a magic solution each time life gets sticky.  Life will never remain mess-free permanently, and I really want to keep working on my coping mechanisms so that maybe I won’t need any additional help down the line.

Last night, Hayden woke up with a stomach bug and can I just tell you: GROSS. He’s never had a virus that affected him quite that way and be glad I’m sparing you the details (I figure leaving out the details will: 1) Spare his teenage-self future embarrassment from my oversharing and 2) I won’t run off all my readers so it’s a win-win for me. I also don’t really want to relive it all again. It’s too soon). 5 months ago, this was the PERFECT storm to send me into an anxiety tailspin. I would have felt just as sick as H did and a been a complete wreck of what-ifs and worst case scenarios. But knowing that I had that backup assistance if I needed it was a huge help. My husband was home and obviously that was helpful because we could tag team and get H settled as much as possible, but that’s usually only half the battle for me. I knew that if things got desperate, I had a 2nd string player ready to pick up the pieces I was leaving behind and I can’t begin to explain the comfort that was. I never needed it, but it was there. Hayden woke up completely fine this morning happy and ready to go out on his bike, totally oblivious to the trauma he caused his dad and me. We (I) decided to take it easy this morning and watch movies instead, but I’m sure we will venture out this afternoon.

If you’re struggling with anxiety and can’t decide whether or not to get some medical help, I can’t suggest enough that you at least explore the option with your doctor. I am by no means a health professional, but the peace of mind I have now knowing that I’ve got options is a total game changer. I’d love to hear your thoughts about this and what you do to cope with the stress in your life. You can find me on Facebook and Instagram.

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